Tammy's Recipes
RSS Feed
PollNew RecipesWho's onlineThere are currently 0 users and 25 guests online.
|
Asking guests to remove their shoes
I've been thinking about this one for a while now. As I mentioned in this post about simplifying my cleaning tasks, we don't wear shoes in our house. This keeps the floors much cleaner, especially when it's wet outside. Since I have a crawling baby who likes to eat everything he finds on the floor, I try to keep my floors really clean. A lot of times when people come over to visit, they will notice that we aren't wearing our shoes inside, and they ask if they should remove their shoes. If their visit is to be a short one (e.g. a few hours or a day and not days or weeks!) I always say, "If you want to. Either way if fine." I feel like part of being a good hostess is making my guests as comfortable as possible. On the other hand, I really would prefer that people remove their shoes when they come inside for a visit. I just can't bear to "make" them do it, just in case they don't want to. Personally, I don't mind removing my shoes at someone else's house. If their floors were filthy, I would mind. But people with filthy floors usually don't care if I walk on them with my shoes. So, what's your preference? Do you like to keep your shoes on at other people's houses, or doesn't it matter?  I guess I do what the host is doing. If there is shoes by the door I take them off. If the host has no shoes I take them off. If the host has shoes I leave them on:) Let's hope my feet don't smell!hehe ...almost nobody wears shoes indoors, neither do we. But if we have for example relatives visiting from Italy we don't mind them wearing shoes, since that is what they're used to back home. Usually they have separate shoes ( or slippers) for using in the house. Our girls are already 5 and 7 years old, so right no we have no baby crawling around the house. When my parents visits us, my father (who is Italian, but has lived in Finland for almost 30 years) usually wears shoes, since he has back problems and taking shoes of would mean extra struggle. I too think that it's more important being a good hostess than worrying about the cleaning up I'll have to do afterwards. When I'm visiting I always take my shoes off.  if we get to somebody's house and I notice a pile of shoes by the door, then I take mine off. I just try to do what most everybody else is doing. To be truthful, the less time I have shoes on my feet, the happier I am! I never wear shoes at home and neither does my daughter. Dh does though. I don't mind, they usually come off once he's home for the evening. In our house, we have painted concrete floors, so I always leave my shoes on and really don't mind if other people do as long as they are not wet and muddy. I also have tons of foot pain issues, so I have special shoes to help with it. If I walk without shoes, my feet ache terribly within just a few minutes. So, the issue of wearing shoes in the house is something I deal with often. If everyone else is taking their shoes off at someone's home, I almost always do too, unless they have told me that I can leave my shoes on. The problem is that as much as I want to help the host family prepare food, or whatever, I am in quite a bit of pain usually if I don't have my shoes on. One thing that I have tried to do if it's muddy or raining, is to wear different shoes to someone's home and then gently ask if they would mind if I put a second pair of clean shoes on when I get into their house. Heidi Two things to think about as far as asking folks to remove their shoes...and actually they both have been mentioned above. Some people HAVE to wear shoes because of their orthodics. For example, the only times I don't have shoes on would be IN the shower or IN bed. I immediately slip my feet in shoes right by the bed when I get up in the middle of the night, and my tennis are right by the shower to put on as soon as I dry off. Another consideration is the smell. Growing up I will ALWAYS remember my cousin's feet--the smell! It could even be more embarrassing for someone to feel they have to take their shoes off when the shoes are masking foot odors. There's no way to hide when four dear friends are sitting chatting and sipping tea--all barefoot and one with smelly feet. So humiliating. You would never know people have either problem. I'd err on the side of being flexible and generous when company comes. I'm a little nutty about this actually. We don't wear shoes in our house and we don't wear shoes at anyone elses either (unless as you said the floor or house is dirty). When I was in school-in home-ec our Teacher took us to a "show of houses" and she taught us the it was impolite to wear your shoes into someone elses house. As far as when people visit our home, if its close family or friends they usually know how I feel about my floors. If the visitor isn't as close I let them chose what they want to do, and try not to focus on it while they are there.  I guess I'm the odd one out, but I prefer to wear shoes at home (mostly my slip-on clogs, but sometimes my tennis shoes if I'm cleaning or working in the kitchen a lot). I hate having cold feet, and I feel a little uncomfortable and not "put together" if I'm just in socks. I also hate to get my socks dirty or to accidentally step in a wet spot in the kitchen or bathroom floors, so I almost always wear shoes in the kitchen. Overall, I prefer to keep my shoes on at other people houses too...I just feel more comfortable and more at ease with my shoes on. That being said, if everyone else was taking theirs off, then I would...especially if the weather is bad outside and there might be the possibility of my shoes being dirty and ruining their nice carpet. We have a baby in the house now too----everything goes in her mouth. I never thought much about removing my shoes before - we wore them in the house and I never paid attention if people wore them in their house or not. Now We have become "converts". We have "seen the error of our ways". The house stays SO much cleaner and I remove my shoes whenever I go to anyone's house and they are always so appreciative - even if they are wearing theirs....they think it's SO nice of us to think that much of them and their house. In the winter I just keep a pair of slippers by the door (along with all our shoes)and an extra new clean pair for company. My sister in law even has a shoe rack next to her door. Being a nurse, I KNOW many germs and bacteria breed in the soles of the shoes. Just think about where you walk everyday. Now do you want your babies to pick up those germs and place them in his/her mouth? We leave a container of socks in our mud room where our guests enter, and there is a chair for guests to sit on to remove the shoes. And we remove our shoes when we visit other homes. we have hardwood floors, allergies, and I just don't like carpet anymore! No more scrubbing stains off the carpet!! I grew up in Canada, so keeping your shoes on, with 6 months of snow and winter, was never an option! In Texas, where I am now, it seems like everyone keeps their shoes on. I don't mind if people wear theirs in my home, but I will usually take mine off in my house and anyone else's. I'm just more comfortable bare foot! Here in Canada, we take our shoes off. This year we haven't had snow but I guess it is just habit....the thought of dragging snow, slush, and all the stuff that goes with it, it just doesn't seem right to keep on my shoes. I am always aware though of how my socks look when we go out because I know that they will be seen. I can remember many a church or family gathering at someones home with a huge pile of shoes at the door. I copied my friends idea from Sweden and put a note on my door: "Welcome friends. Please remove your shoes." I have a pair of "indoor only tennies" that I wear during my morning routine. Melissa At home, I NEVER wear shoes around the house. I love to be bare foot. But, I don't care if other people wear their shoes in my house... unless their shoes are really dirty or wet of course. When I go to other people's houses, I intinctively take my shoes off just to be safe. Unless I already know they wear shoes in their house then I feel funny being the only bare/stocking footed person running around. When I come to your house though, I'll be sure to take my shoes off... even if you tell me it doesn't matter! :) Court  I great up in Canada, but in two different cultures. In Quebec (French-Canadian culture), we never took our shoes off in the house. We walked right in and kept our shoes on. In our house, and at others'. It's just the way it was. At the age of 12, we moved to Ontario (English culture) and I was shocked that everyone took their shoes off before entering a house! Wow. That is just WEIRD! ;-) lol I'd never seen that before. It took some getting used to! My parents adopted that "custom" and made us kids take our shoes off as well. Although they were find with us, once in a while, walking through the entrance and kitchen (no carpet there) with our shoes. =) Now I have my own house and it's just habit for us to take our shoes off. With having a few feet of snow outside right now, it's even more important! ;-) Yeah, there are times when we don't take them off when we run to bedroom to get something, but that's not the norm. People who visit us seem to automatically take their shoes off. I think that's maybe more of a Canadian (English- Canadian!) think to do!! I've never had to ask anyone either way. I feel rude about asking guests to remove their shoes - for example, as has been said, they might NEED to wear shoes, or have holes in their socks/tights, have diseased toenails, smelly feet - whatever. If people stay here overnight, I let them know that we have a "no shoes upstairs rule" because we have pale carpet up there and have had some disgusting things tracked upstairs before. DOwnstairs we have wooden floors, and thankfully anyone in stilletos has just slipped those off without being asked. My husband wears his shoes/boots downstairs out of habit but my son and I are in slippers. If we visit someone's house we take off our shoes - remembering to be wearing good socks! Love, Lucy x  ...it depends on the person/situation! :) I guess I'll stick with my answer of, "If you want to!" when asked! ;) Thanks for all the input, everyone. I actually hadn't thought about smelly feet or that someone might have holes in their socks. Hmn... my socks have holes in them though! On the bottoms ;) Maybe I should make dishrags... :D I don't actually mind taking my shoes off at other peoples houses but my dh has to wear his shoes at all times or else his feet will hurt. My in-laws take their shoes off inside and ask it of others so we always just bring a pair of indoor only shoes for use while we're visiting. The one thing I do object to is that there is no place to sit down by their door to remove or put on your shoes. Fine for my skinny, fit in-laws but for overweight, bad knees, bad back me it is very awkward to try and put on tennies while standing. So if you do ask guests to remove shoes please provide a chair or bench by the door. I guess growing up in Hawaii we have the custom to take off our shoes in the house, and it is percieved as rude if someone doesn't, especially when they see a pile of shoes by the front door. But I must say that I would understand that some people are not being rude, they could have cold feet, foot issues that require they wear shoes, or they could have foot odor issues. I try not to let it bother me if someone comes in my home with their shoes, I just tell myself they have feet issues! LOL A factor that hasn't been mentioned yet: I prefer to wear skirts all the time but don't favor the skirts+tennis-shoes look, so I wear nylons practically every day. I always feel very awkward at someone's house where it is expected that shoes are removed (i.e. everyone else has) because I have the choice of being uncomfortable (1) because I have my shoes on while everyone else does not or (2) walking around only in nylons. Nylons can get a runner very easily if you're not wearing shoes, plus sometimes I'm already wearing nylons with a "patched" runner (I'm cheap, what can I say?)! So anyways, if someone keeps their shoes on at your house, here's another possible reason why... :) "my socks have holes in them though! On the bottoms ;) Maybe I should make dishrags... :D" How do you do this? Do just cut them open and use? I am extremely intrigued by the idea....must be the 'frugal' in me. I think it would actually be rude for a hostess to ask a guest to remove their shoes. To me, it is implying "you're welcome here as long as you don't make me clean extra once you are gone". Then again, I always wear shoes. I take them off at night, put them by the bed with a clean pair of socks on top, and get right into them in the morning. I have problems with my feet, if I went for even half an hour shoeless (unless they were put up in a recliner or something) I will be hardly able to walk. I also have blood pressure issues when pregnant; if I take my shoes off, my feet might swell and I might not be able to get them on again! But I would never want to tell anyone that - I think going into nitty gritty details of medical history is rude also. I'm not old - under 30, so no one would probably think I have all these "old lady" issues with my feet! But I have 4 separate inserts in my shoes; my weight fluctuates so much and we have bad insurance so I haven't gotten proper orthotics, yet If I arrived at a house that had a SIGN that said "Take off your shoes" - I might think twice about ringing the bell. I would feel slightly unwelcome and also, would be in pain by the end of the visit. Even worse are people who offer you "house slippers" - to me that's like bowling shoes! Who knows who's been in them before!  But we will walk in with them on if we have forgotten something etc... But I know that will have to change when we get new carpets. So I'm thinking it should be a rule now, no shoe in the house! Also bring slippers or have slippers on hand for those who may need them when visiting. :) ~Tanya I live in Nova Scotia, and I have never visited a home where it is considered "normal" to have your shoes on indoors. If you're only popping in a minute (and I mean that quite literally) sometimes the host/hostess will say, "Oh, don't worry about it," but other than that, general consensus is that it's inconsiderate to leave your shoes on. You don't track the outdoors in. Actually, Dear Abby did a thing on this a few years ago, and I was shocked to discovery that in some places, it's rude to ask people to take off their shoes. Here, you just do it. It's expected. This is so interesting. I'd love to know where all of the different commenters live as much of the opinion seems to vary from place to place. We currently live in Mississippi, but I grew up in Virginia and we lived in North Carolina between places. P.S. I was the anonymous above who lived in VA, NC, and MS and wondered where everyone else was from. I typically wear slippers in my own house, but a few months ago when the weather was warmer I was at an aquaintance's house. I came wearing rubber soled, smooth bottomed sandals. She asked me to remove my shoes. I obliged, but felt uncomfortable being barefoot, and without socks. I would have preferred she not ask me to remove the shoes. Furthermore the house was hardwood floor, so it's not liek she should ahve been concerned about getting dirt on the carpet. I would have preferred she not ask me to remove the shoes. Ironically, when she came to my house a month later, she kept her shoes on... even though my house is carpeted and she had socks! I guess I felt liek she was picky about keeping her house clean but not about keeping my house clean. Thanks for the continuing input, everyone! I really had no idea that for some people, taking off their shoes would be such a huge problem or cause hard feelings/an unpleasant visit. (Goes to show how easy it is to interpret everything through our own experiences!) I'm willing to do extra cleaning after we have guests, and thankfully, our carpet doesn't show stains too easily. There have been occasions where it was muddy outside and guests have come into the living room with mud on their shoes and I had to do some carpet scrubbing afterwards... that's not exactly fun. Then, there were the tennis shoes that left extremely-difficult-to-remove black streaks on the kitchen linoleum... I scrubbed for a long time on those! They eventually wore off. So, I wonder... if you live in a location where people do both (take off shoes inside OR wear shoes inside) and it's a big deal to you one way or another, would it be best to come prepared either way? Like, if it's muddy outside, bring a pair of clean shoes along. Or if you like slippers, bring yours. Or should the hostess just not bother to mop the floors before a person comes over and tracks dirt in? If someone asked me to take off my shoes I would do it. No problem. I would NOT be offended------particularly if they have a baby they are concerned about. We have concrete floors here and I HAVE to wear shoes inside or I have foot problems. I hate carpeting and do not plan to ever have it again. Also I would not want to worry about my carpet. I can remember years ago being at my SIL's house. They had new white carpet and everyone had to remove their shoes and they were so stresssed out about their carpet. I would not want to have to worry about that. Hi, So I cheat, I leave one pair of shoes out so that it is clear where we leave shoes, and when people ask, I say, "If you would not mind." On occasions when it is icky outside I have asked people to remove shoes simply saying that with Ava playing on the carpets, it is too hard to keep up, so if they could help me, I would appreciate it. Kristy Phil 2:9-11 I really don't like wearing shoes. At home, I pad around in my socks all the time. It's much more comfortable, and going without shoes really does keep the floor cleaner. When visiting people, I follow the 'When In Rome' approach. If you answer your door shoe-free, I'm taking mine off. Since I go sock-footed at home, it's not a big deal to me. These comments are all reminding me of why I hate carpet! I know, it's soft and warm (especially on chilly days like today!) but I just never feel like it's really clean. If I really had my top choice, I'd choose wood/linoleum with a few rugs. :) We are in a situation here where our floors are continually dirty. You would probably not want to put a baby down here. We are living in what will be my Dh's future shop. A metal building with concrete floors. We have goats, guineas and chickens and no barn......no they don't live with us :-) but all their stuff does. We keep the goat and poultry food in the house. Right now we are constantly going in and out when we do chores. The food, milking stuff has to be taken out, the milk brought back in. We are in day 8 of below freezing and an ice on the ground and we have to haul hot water from the house out to the animals. We are going in and out in and out. There is no way we could take off our shoes every time we came in and out. Once we build our house and have a barn too with most of the animal stuff is outside hopefully our floors will be cleaner but I don't ever see dh taking his shoes on and off. Black streaks come off with an art gum eraser (the white kind, not the pink school eraser). Some people have yucky carpets/floors. Others are clean freaks. If I was visiting a clean freak, I'd gladly remove my footwear. If I was visiting a messy friend, I'd keep my shoes on unless asked to remove them. In my region of the country, we do not have a cultural expectation about this. It varies from home to home. I always leave this decision up to my visitors.  One thing also, if you expect or ask people to take off their shoes you better have a place for them to sit to put them back on. A bench or something by the door. It's very aggravating to try to put some types of shoes on while standing up. You feel like an idiot and you probably look like one also falling over yourself putting your shoes on with your behind in the air for all to see. Just some things people don't think about! okay I have alot of people coming in and out of my house throughout the day. It does not bother me if they wear their shoes if they are clean or wiped on the rug or cloth that I have placed in front of my door. I walk around my house with and without shoes. But here is my complaint, I have difficult carpet to clean it shows everything and I will scrub and scrub and I still think it looks dirty it's actually kind of depressing to do that much work and not get any satifaction out of it. Some children and DH will come into my house with muddy or greasy shoes and that realy makes me mad. Just more cleaning and still dirty looking carpet. Someday I would like to get hardwood floors.:) Post new comment |
Recipe of the WeekSearchRecipes- Appetizers (53)
- Breads (51) - Breakfast (43) - Desserts (213) - Cakes (34) - Cookies (14) - Misc. desserts (51) - Pies (13) - Drinks (12) - Main Dishes (273) - Beef (58) - Chicken (53) - Fish & Game (5) - Meatless (30) - Miscellaneous (9) - Sandwiches (12) - Side Dishes (96) - Fruit (3) - Salads (19) - Vegetables (30) - Snacks (31) - Soups (19) - Food Preservation (11) Guest ChefRecent comments
News Categories |
We have grown up always taking our shoes off in the house so we take them off at other people's houses. Growing up on a farm, we wouldn't want to wear our footwear inside anyways. :)
I also think that it is just polite to take your shoes off, unless of course, the person insists you keep them on. :)
A few family members/relatives sometime wear shoes(they keep them clean :D) in the house because of their orthodics. Dad's side of the family have bad feet and have to wear the orthodics pretty much whenever on their feet. We don't mind at all. :)